It's official. I am H.U.G.E. My butt is freakin' gigantic! I think I have 3 chins now. I won't even start on the "mom-pouch" or back fat. It's really quite disgusting. I am horrified. I let this happen again? Seriously! This is so crappy.
The last couple of months have been sooooo stressful and traumatic. A different kind than dealing with bi-polar. This kind hits you inside of your heart, breaks it, and then beats you all up inside. When this kind of trauma occurs, I eat. Carbs. Lots of them. Chocolate. Lots of it. Ice Cream. By the pint. Diet Coke. By the gallons. The last time a vegetable saw the inside of my mouth was Friday when I had Pei Wei add some veggies to my Honey Seared Chicken and Brown Rice. Before that, I can't recall exactly. Does lettuce and tomato on a hamburger count?
I tried to get dressed this morning in something other than jeans. (it's gonna be 106 today). I have no.thing. to wear. Seriously! Everything is too small.....like can't even zip it up too small. Shirts-forget it.... unless you're into the snowman look. I have one blouse I can wear. ONE. Everything else is either workout pants (draw-string waist) or huge t-shirts...the ones I supposedly swore off. So.....look like a total slouch or a snowman. Nice choices.
You'd think that since I identified the problem, I could fix it. Start watching what I'm eating, take a long walk at 2am when it's finally cooled off. But, alas, No. My insides are still on high alert for more trauma, plus we're moving, plus now my husband works at home (whole other post). And... well, I'm lazy. Too much stress just zaps my will to do just about anything. This may call for an intervention of the "Kami" variety. That's not gonna happen til we are in CA, so until then, I guess I'll just wear my fat pants (2 pairs of jeans) and go buy some tents for tops. Damnit.
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3 comments:
You have so much going on! You'll lose it again. I would love to find something that we could do together once you're here...fall maybe? We'll find a race in the middle. You are also one of my best supporters and I LOVE you for that. It is so helpful to read your words.
I would love to see you this memorial day weekend if you guys find time. I'll email you my number!
Oh sweetie, I'm sure it's not as bad as you think it is. However, I do feel your pain. I've put on a few myself as of late. I hate IT!!! The worst part is that it doesn't go on in the same spots that it once did. It use to go on in more obvious places. Now it goes on in places like you said, the back. I never knew people got fat in the back until now. What the crap is up with that? And I totally here ya on the butt thing. Sheesh! Oh well. I told Brian I may be a little plump but I sure am enjoying all my eating. On the flip side of it. I've got to get back to running or something. I'm pathetic!
Hang in there! At least were not alone. We got each other! So it's all good!
Take Care,
JoLynn
On this last comment I meant it use to go on in less obvious places. Sorry I can't type!
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